Party News: Our £1,000 Fund Progresses

How does parson manage these things? He asks Slumton-on-the-Boose for £10,000 for a new church in which to practice the cannibalistic rite of chewing His flesh and drinking His blood, and it is at once forthcoming; we have been cadging the hardest we know how, for fully three months, for £1,000 wherewith to prevent parson and his gang from chewing Your flesh and drinking Your blood, and all the money you have boarded so far is under £200. Gosh! we shall have to get a holy Joe to write these little encouragements. We have more success in the pied piper line and and find it easier far to charm rats than to entice the shy shilling out of your pockets, swelp our Gord we do.
Well, we are not going to make a long drawn-out torture of it this month. We have pointed out your duty pretty plainly. It is up to you to make good if you want Socialism. £188 odd in three months really isn’t bad, all things considered—in fact it is distinctly encouraging as showing that there exists a growing appreciation of the revolutionary proposition, and a steadily stiffening determination to achieve it. This by no means alters the fact that you have got to buck up if we are to commence totting up the second thousand pounds with the advent of the new year, and we do, really, truly, absolutely and positively, on our dying, solemn oath, want to do that.
We are compelled to hold over our third list of acknowledgments until our next issue