The Legend of Litter
Now, it came to pass in the land of Verminy that the people were poor and sorely pressed. They toiled and spun, but enjoyed not the fruits of their labour, for they dwelt in that which was called CAPITALISM, being a strange land in which the multitude made all good things, yet their lords and masters kept them in bondage to do their bidding. Now it came to pass that the multitude knew not the CAUSE of their hunger and want, and they cried: “Wherefore are we oppressed for our hearts are heavy within us and the skin is tight upon our bones.” And the lords and masters (known in those days as Capitalists) became afraid, for it is not wise that such questions be asked. Now there arose a man who said: “I have the gift of tongues, I will speak false words unto them that ask,” and his name was Litter. So the Capitalists said: “We have heard of thee and we know thou wilt serve us well, but there are a few among the multitude who are known as Socialists; these ye must destroy lest they speak the truth to the poor,” and Litter made answer to the poor: “You are oppressed because ye have no colonies, nor have ye raw materials,” and the poor, not knowing otherwise, hearkened and spake, saying, let us arm and get colonies lest we die, and when they armed they marched forth and vanquished the Astians, saying, ’tis well that others be oppressed that we may flourish, and they destroyed the Seers and the Healers, and Litter spake, saying, ’tis well for so shall perish all who are not of the true faith.
Now, in this day, the Capitalists of Verminy took unto themselves the name of Litterites, to hide their aims of evil. Then the Litterites coveted the land of the Zeks, which abounded with iron, coal, and such things beloved in those days, and they cried: “Wherefore do these Zeks oppress our brethren, they are few, we are many, give unto us their land, for they worship faiths which are an abomination, and we shall force upon them the true faith, which is called Fascism. The gods of small nations are not powerful, and they may turn to the faith which is called Socialism.”
Now it came to pass in these days that the fair lands of the earth were in one mighty Empire, which, like unto the land of Verminy and the land of Zeks, was a Capitalist Empire, and was ruled over by the land of the Briths, whose Capitalists were clever and learned in the ways of the serpent. Now among the great ones who ruled over the land of the Briths, was he who spake the thoughts of the Capitalists, and his name was Lamberane. Now it was not to the liking of the rulers of Brith that the Litterites should become rich and mighty, and they made great orations, and there was much coming and going from land to land, but the rulers of Brith knew not the strength and might of the Litterites and feared lest the lands of their Empire be taken from them. So the rulers of Brith spake unto Lamberane, saying: “Go ye swiftly unto him that is called Litter and speak soft words, lest he smite us before we are ready.” And Lamberane sped across the waters and spake secret words, which are not known unto this day. And it was called Crisis, and Litter blessed him, saying: “Verily thou art one of us.” Now it came to pass that the multitude in all lands trembled at the fear of war; they dug themselves deep homes in the ground, they hoarded unto themselves food, and sent out their young, saying: “Go forth, lest ye be destroyed.” Now it came to pass that in all the lands there arose a few, who cried: “Wherefore do ye weep? Know ye that this war is not of your seeking; ’tis but a war of greed and avarice, a war of the lords and rulers of all lands. Ye have not wealth, ye have not riches, wherefore do ye heed the voice of the Capitalist. Hearken ye then unto the voice of him that is called a Socialist, learn ye of his faith which calleth unto the poor of all lands, saying—UNITE.” Now it came to pass that they who were called Socialist were few in the land, and—here endeth the legend.