Ballyhoo and baloney

The National Conventions of the Democratic and Republican Parties have become forums for putting the finishing touches on the “cult of personality” of the candidates, culminating with the vacuous speeches of the candidates themselves.

A demagogue, H.L. Mencken once said, is someone “who will preach doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.” This is a pretty good description of the US presidential candidates in action at their late-summer conventions. Although, to be fair to those who listened to the convention speeches, it was more a case of preaching idiotic ideas to people who wished those ideas were true.

The contrast between the gassy rhetoric of the politicians and the weighty problems facing workers was particularly striking at this year’s conventions, highlighted further by the juxtaposition between jubilant delegates inside the convention hall and the pepper-sprayed protestors outside.

The candidates from both parties employed the same basic template for demagoguery in writing their convention speeches. We encounter the same sorts of rhetorical techniques and the logic of “public relations” shapes every line. The candidates are less interested in conveying ideas than manipulating them to fashion images to sell the product – in this case, the candidates themselves.

Family lies

The first chapter of Convention Speeches for Dummies, if such a book were ever to be written, would probably be entitled: “Making the Most of the Family.” Each candidate, without exception, began with extravagant praise for the family – the candidate’s own family, that is. The candidates informed the American people that they too have spouses who are loving and loyal, children and grandchildren they are proud of, and hardworking parents as wise as they are kind. (Perhaps this convinced the sceptics who thought that the candidates had been hatched in a secret laboratory in North Dakota.)

Behind my plastic exterior, each candidate seemed to be saying, is a real live human being, just like you. Just like us, but even better. Thanks to the “quintessentially American” values of hard work, perseverance and personal integrity that the candidates acquired as children from their saintly mothers.

In his speech, Joe Biden described his 90-year-old mother as a person “defined by her sense of honour” who “believes bravery lives in every heart” and that “it will be summoned.” She taught little Joey the “dignity of work” and that “anyone can make it if they try” and emphasized that it is important to “live our faith and treasure our family.” Biden said that his “mother’s creed is the American creed: No one is better than you; you are everyone’s equal; and everyone is equal to you.” (And US Senators are more equal than most.)

McCain mentioned his mother too, saying: “I wouldn’t be here tonight but for the strength of her character.” Thankfully he was not as long-winded as Biden – perhaps to secure adequate time for another thrilling episode of “John McCain: War Hero” – but he did mention that his mother taught him some patriotic claptrap about how “we’re all meant to use our opportunities to make ourselves useful to our country.”

Obama praised his mother “who raised my sister and me on her own while she worked and earned her degree; who once turned to food stamps but was still able to send us to the best schools in the country with the help of student loans and scholarships.” For good measure, Obama threw in his grandmother too, “who worked her way up from the secretarial pool to middle-management” and taught him “about hard work.”

The mother featured in Palin’s speech was Palin herself, who “was just your average hockey mom” whose political career began when she “signed up for the PTA” because she “wanted to make my kids’ public education better.” Palin had a small-town upbringing that encouraged “honesty, sincerity and dignity” and she thanked her parents for teaching her that, “this is America, and every woman can walk through every door of opportunity.”

It wasn’t just the parents who were mobilized for the cause: children and grandchildren served as useful props too. Palin’s 4-month old son, who suffers from Down Syndrome, was brought to the raucous event and passed around on stage for the photo op. Obama made use of his two daughters, who told daddy how much they love him. And Biden said that when he looked at his grandchildren, and at Obama’s daughters, he realized: “I’m here for their future.” Many watching this strange spectacle must hope that the candidates’ love for those little ones will be enough to keep their powerful fingers away from “the button.”

But, lest we feel too safe, in the next breath these politicians are talking about their sons who are headed off to war, such as Beau Biden or Jimmy McCain. Palin also got some good mileage out of her son Track, who not only is headed to Iraq but will conveniently ship out on September 11 “in the service of his country” (by securing the Starbucks in the Green Zone).

It is rather sickening to see how willing the candidates are to squeeze out whatever political advantage can be had from their children. Even the pregnancy of Palin’s teenage daughter – and shotgun wedding – is good election fodder, appealing to those families who have experienced that common side-effect of “abstinence education.”